Jonathan Swift

We have just enough religion to make us hate, but not enough to make us love on another.

May you live every day of your life.

The stoical scheme of supplying our wants by lopping off our desires, is like cutting off our feet when we want shoes.

How is it possible to expect mankind to take advice when they will not so much as take warning

Some people take more care to hide their wisdom than their folly.

May you live all the days of your life.

Argument is the worst sort of conversation.

A wise man should have money in his head, but not in his heart.

Nothing is so hard for those who abound in riches as to conceive how others can be in want.

Faith he must make his stories shorter Or change his comrades once a quarter.

Censure is the tax a man pays to the public for being eminent.

As blushing will sometimes make a whore pass for a virtuous woman, so modesty may make a fool seem a man of sense.

It is in men as in soils where sometimes there is a vein of gold which the owner knows not of.

When a true genius appears in this world, you may know him by this sign, that the dunces are all in confederacy against him.

Ambition often puts men upon doing the meanest offices so climbing is performed in the same posture with creeping.

It is useless to attempt to reason a man out of a thing he was never reasoned into.

I row after health like a waterman...

One of the best rules in conversation is, never to say a thing which any of the company can reasonably wish had been left unsaid.

No wise man ever wished to be younger.